


I'll meet you in your Dreams

by NickyRae



Category: Avatar: Legend of Korra
Genre: Canon Compliant, Canon Lesbian Relationship, F/F, Letters, Longing, Yuri
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-02
Updated: 2020-09-10
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:48:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26242915
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NickyRae/pseuds/NickyRae
Summary: Since the day the airbender kids found her, two things ensue:Korra finds herself unable to stay awake, dreaming of a mystery girland the city is cloaked in a rain that never ends.What does this have to do with Asami?Eventual NSFW starting Chp 4
Relationships: Korra/Asami Sato
Comments: 10
Kudos: 61





	1. A look back

“Hey Naga.” Korra muttered lowly as she sensed her animal companion nearing. In response the polar bear dog headbutted herself into Korra's arms, refusing any inattention after 6 long months separated. A small chuckle formed in the back of Korra’s thoat, “Haha, looks like everyone’s happy to see me so far.” But even the verbal acknowledgement wasn’t enough to sway Korra’s fears about seeing her friends again. It had been 3 years. Three long and painful years separated. Years she spent regaining the ability to walk to fighting her own inner demons. Of which many still haunted her.

Gazing off the railing offered no sense of peace, no feelings of home, and no sudden realizations. Her mind was still a chaotic mess and she felt sick to her stomach.Despite the happy exchanges, the soft greetings and warm welcomes, the only thought that prevailed her sea of guilt and depression was...

 _Asami._ A name she felt so torn in thinking of. One that brought warmth to her chest and a pain to her heart. _I just...Abandoned her...And everyone else._ Throughout the years no matter how many words she wrote or didn’t let herself write, it was never enough. Her body refused to find enough strength to even impersonate her former self. She fought with the idea of being left behind in this unforgiving world, as though perhaps it would have truly been best to fade away from people’s minds all together. Even then, she unknowingly longed for the one person to this day she couldn’t stop thinking about.

It was In that moment Korra felt her knees give out beneath her. Sinking onto the wooden floor of the temple balcony. Her breathe wavered. _Why...do I keep thinking about her? Why after all these years do I still have this weird fixation on her? Am I just that scared of what she'll think of me? Or..._

Korra’s hands found the side of her head as she crawled into a fearful position. Even Naga’s reassuring nuzzles could do little other than coax onto her side. Tears welled up within Korra’s eyes. _I just wanted everyone to forget about me but I had to be selfish...I had to be selfish enough to keep talking to her...I couldn’t stop. She my...best friend… but I just wanted her to hate me._

Her gentle cries were hushed in the soft hours of the night. Conflicting thoughts made a battle ground in Korra’s mind, and for reasons she refused to comprehend...they centered on a green eyed woman that she missed with the the entirety of her heart. Korra's body pressed further into the floor as she wept. All the sound in the world was sucked up as a low crickle was heard from her breast pocket. For a second her breath hitched and her tears stalled. Reality calmed itself, and she returned to it with an unwavering gaze of the wood she laid on. Naga huddled herself around Korra's curled up form, The heat from her coat keeping off the winds from the brewing clouds of night. Minutes passed as hours do and her sniffling slowly subsided.

Reaching into her pocket Korra gripped host of small letters she had wrote and re wrote more often than she’d ever admit to anyone.

The first was the letter she first wrote on one of her worst days in therapy. The paper was tear soaked and crumpled, but never thrown away.

_Asami,_

_I keep thinking about if I can keep this up. My body doesn’t want this anymore. Not food, not to walk, not to let myself breathe without pain._

_How can anyone think I’ll ever be the Avatar, or that I was ever meant to be one? Katara told me to think about ~~something,~~ anything that would give me hope or the strength to want to get better. I couldn’t really think of anything._

_Even if I get better, I’ll never be who I was._

_I keep fighting the urge to write. I just want everyone to give up on me. I already have. Please just forget about me._

_\- Korra._

...

The second was a letter when she’d conned herself into heading to Republic City. It was full of longing, hope, and the illusion that she could be forgiven.

_Asami,_

_I’m sorry I haven’t written in a few months. Things have been getting easier, but I really feel like I’ve hit a wall. I use to be able to go into the Avatar state whenever I wanted even just to win air skating races against the kids. Now I couldn’t even go into it if my life was in danger._

_But even though I can’t, I’ve decided to come home to Republic city. I want to help Mako fight street toughs and take Bolin up on going to watch a mover together. I want to see all the good you've done for the city. I always have so much I want to tell you but I can't really figure out the words for some reason. It’s weird but I always want to talk to you. I guess this is what having a female best friend is like._

_But I finished therapy for the day, so I guess I could talk about everything I miss since I’ll be home soon anyway. I miss eating at Kwons. I miss burping matches with Bolin. I miss Mako being Mako and Tenzin’s grumpy face. I miss the kids and air skating around the temple. ~~Its weird but I think I miss you the most. Don’t tell anyone though. I miss your smile. I wish i had asked you to come with but I’m still glad I didn’t.~~ I’m going to ask my father in the morning if I can head to Republic city. I hope you’ll be able to forgive me._

_-Korra._

...

The fourth was a letter she wrote between being battered with mud by Toph in the swamp.

_Asami,_

_You probably don’t know this but I’ve met Toph. Imagine Lin, now add 2 more Lins and give them all a headache. That’s how grumpy this woman is. Its like her body is made of bitterness. She wont stop calling me twinkle toes and I don’t know why, maybe crazy runs in the family._

_I haven’t got your letters because well, I’m not exactly at the South Pole anymore. I’ll tell you about it sometime. But I have a bunch of letters I wrote but never sent. I can show them to you if you’d like. I don’t know when I’ll finally come home but I hope you’re doing okay. I’ve got to go catch toads for dinner._

_\- Korra_

...

The last was scrawled on the back of an envelope, hastily written, the entirety had been scratched out, but she kept it nonetheless.

~~_Asami, I had a dream about you. It was weird. Maybe I’m worried you’re in danger? I hope you’re doing okay._ ~~

~~_Korra_ ~~

Underneath that same scrawling was a note from several days later.

_Asami,_

_I had another dream about you. I was trying to airbend, and you were there I looked down at my hands and Instead of air, it was water. And you jumped and hugged me when I did it. I don’t think I was me, but I know I was me. I looked up and you weren't you, but it felt familiar. I said thanks but I called your name as something different than Asami Rango...Rangi I think? Do you know what it means?_

_Korra_

...

Korra sighed as she reminisced every moment exposed within those letters. The hope, the anguish, and the constant repression of feelings she refused to think about. The winds around her and Naga dropped in temperature. A storm was coming. “What am I going to do when I see he-everyone?” She whispered to herself. Her eyes closed softly as sleep finally overtook her despite the soft pricks of rain. Even though she was home, nothing made sense to her, especially not what was to come.


	2. a Dream within a Dream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Korra gets an unexpected visitor as her nightmares continue.

Korra lunged awoke from what could only be a nightmare. Her bed soaked in sweat and her breathe was failing her. A rush of red could only be remembered then darkness. 

_Wait...How did I get here? I remember falling asleep outside…_

Before she could continue her own thoughts, a knock could be heard on her door. “Korra? It’s Pema. May I come in?” 

Korra gave a hushed yes and allowed herself to calm down as she entered the room.

“I brought you some Tea. Breakfast was a while ago but you didn’t respond when we called so I figured you just needed some space.” Pema’s gaze was soft on Korra's disheveled form.

Korra’s eyes furrowed as she listened to the older woman speak. It was as though she were cutting in and out like a bad radio. Shaking her head Korra’s eyes drifted downward towards a cup she didn't realize she was holding. 

Words were said but not exchanged. A soft dizziness was pervaded by the thrum of water against the roof. Pema's talking faded into the background’s background. Within the span of a blink the cup had vanished from Korra's hands to the bedside table and Pema returned to the doorframe. Korra's mouth fell agape as Pema chimed before she left, “Oh also, you should stay inside today, it’s suppose to rain all week.”

The rest of the morning Korra fought with herself to leave her room. She’d been back to air temple island for 3 days now but her body didn’t recognize that she was home. _Maybe thats why I’ve been having such a hard time sleeping?_ She thought absently to herself. 

But truthfully, Korra hadn’t slept well in months. Nightly when thoughts seemed to collect themselves, her inner most demons found her. Bad dreams turned to night terrors, sleepless nights turned into restless weeks. Whenever she didn’t have nightmares of traumatic events, demons overtaking her, villains nearly murdering her...she had dreams of being home. They were the shortest of her dreams. Sometimes only seconds but they felt so real she at times risked a taxing nightmare for only a chance to return to the slim chance it was a good dream. 

_A dream with Asami._ Korra caught herself thinking only to shake her head vigorously in defense. “Ugh, its weird to think about anyone this much, even if its your best friend. 

But Korra wasn’t wrong. Even though she could count her “good dreams” from the past 3 years on her fingers and toes, the ones of Asami were at least a handful. 

But it would also be untruthful to say that the worst ones didn’t include that same woman. The fear of rejection in light of her own abandonment. The fear of being hated but the desire to be. Beyond being poisoned close to death, having her bending forced from her, and fighting international terrorists… none of that surmounted to the looks her friend often gave her in her nightmares. 

With a heavy sign Korra lifted herself from her day dreams and floated along the temple. Her thoughts were so untethered the world passed her by in a blur. Exhausted wasn’t even the right word for it, though she couldn’t find a better term. 

As the kids greeted her throughout the morning she smiled half heartedly causing each of the children to look to eachother with worried looks. “Is she okay?” They murmured to each other while Korra drifted to another room. Their whispering was immediately chided by Pema’s warning gaze causing them to scurry from the room. However, even still Pema worried as she noticed Korra’s near sleep walking state. T _his morning she was barely there, maybe she just needs more time to adjust to being home. I wonder when she'll finally see her friends._

* * *

  
_Asami was running along a hallway, every turn lead further into a maze of red velvet walls. Korra ran, fighting to keep up. They kept up the chase until metal began to ooze from over the maze walls. Korra’s running became more frantic, chasing after Asami who kept a consistent distance no matter the pace. The metal water rose as Korra found herself shouting her name. The metal stuck to her like a sea of glue as it rose over her legs. Every push and strain of her body was nulled by the ever rising tide. As her pace slowed, as did that of the girl he chased until eventually, they were standing still. Within a blink of the eye, the metal was chin height while Korra continued to scream for her. “...Asami…” Korra gasped as metal finally filled her throat. It was in that moment that Asami’s form turned her gaze back towards Korra’s and smiled as the silver sea finally overtook them._

* * *

“Asami!” Korra blurted out. Her body was drenched yet again, not in sweat, but in rain. _How the hell..._

Korra looked around to find herself on the roof of one of the training temples, her fists together in a meditating position while the rain poured atop her. 

Korra’s confusion was palpable as she made a small wind shield to keep the rain from further coating her. Her brow furrowed from her dream but how in the world did she even get up-

“Achoo!”

Her thoughts were cut short as a sneeze alerted her that she could figure it out later. The thicket of the rainclouds made it impossible to tell the time from above. As trudged homeward a temple clock however alerted her that it was well past lunchtime.

 _I… I really can’t remember getting up there. Or really...anything from this morning now that I think about it._ As she made her way to her bedroom she casually shrugged off Tenzin’s befuddled look at her soaked form. She was able to dissuade his worries claiming it was a meditation exercise to...improve her patience? “Haha...yea I wanted to see if I could be as patient as you are with Meelo and the Kids! Any tips?” Her diversion seemed to work as Tenzin swelled with air nomad and fatherly pride. “Hmm, Well I suppose after a few lightning strikes, an earthquake and maybe a tsunami you might get the hang of it.” He chimed, boasting of his own mastery of the four children. “Oh! B-but don’t even think about that! It’s too dangerous and we can’t have the Avatar wandering off in weather like this! You could become sick or worse.” His face became flush with worry. 

Korra could only laugh in response. “Don’t worry Tenzin, I’ll stay out of the rain.” His eyebrows relaxed as she sultered towards her room. _Or at least I think I will._

The walk to her room seemed longer than normal. As though her legs slowly lost the will to carry the body above them. Her vision grew hazy and the doorway to her room almost seemed to grow father and farther away. Without her permission, or even her knowledge, sleep finds its way to her before she even hit the ground.

* * *

_Sapphire blue eyes opened to the soft, pillowy ground below her. Her hands drifted over the golden grass._

“Am I in the spirit world? No. This is something different.” _She thought with perfect clarity. The vivid sounds surrounding her could almost have convinced her it were real. The smells the wind brushing over her. It was a dream within a dream._

_Acting on its own her body lifted itself from the floor to sit up right. She gazed off into an endless golden grass field with a sunset sky in every direction._

_She closed her eyes and let the world fade into blackness. No fear, no chase. Just bliss._

~Hey you~ _She heard a voice in front of her whisper. The voice familiar and yet the tone made them foreign. Korra’s eyes fluttered until rose soft lips enveloped her own. Her eyes never opened but her chest was abound with a warmth she’d never felt before. A longing she couldn’t give name to, and a feeling she never wanted to leave her._

_But just as soon as the came they left with nothing but the scent of Jasmine as a goodbye._

* * *

_Okay what the actual fuck is going on?!_ Korra yelled internally as her hand found the bump on her head, jolting herself awake. She cursed the small welp forming on her forehead, grumpling in annoyance.

taking a glance around, she was all alone once again.. All was silent on her floor. Event he continuous rain that battered the windows seemed to be a soundless display.

 _Korra~_ she heard a whisper around her. Her eyes darted wide trying to locate the voice. 

And suddenly...she could feel the heat of breathe over her ear. So real it reverberated down her spine causing a shiver to run up her. ~ _Do you miss me yet?~_ the voice rang like a bell chime. Korra’s body paralyzed as the voice grazed down her neck and a moan shuttered itself unwillingly through her motionless fear. Two hands guided their way up Korra’s sides, ghosting their way around to her taut abs and upwards taking time to run a finger underneath Korra’s breasts before leaving all together. Swallowing thickly she gathered the strength to snap her body around to face the intruder. Fire gathered in her hands ready to strike and-

No one.

Her heart rate sped like a racehorse down a mountainside and sweat gathered down her neck The fear of her imaginary visitor was all too reminiscent of the visions that drove her to near insanity the last few years. Even still she forced her body upwards, throwing her throats in the back of her mind where they belonged. 

None of it mattered.

Not the potential that she was sleep walking.

Not the dreams or the night terrors. 

Not the disturbing amount they revolved around a certain raven haired woman.

not… the uncomfortable heat between her legs. The lingering feel of velvet hands running up her- _NO!_

...That mattered the least of all.

...

She was home now and that was all that mattered.

Coaxing her legs to rise from their paranoia, she led herself towards to the kitchen for something to fill her stomach. A yawn stifled in the back of her throat.

Clutching the She was greeted by a familiar face she was all too surprised to see at the table. The bags under her eyes were accompanied by a lopsided grin.

“Oh...Hey Bolin.” 

  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do you think so far? :>


	3. When it rains it pours

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bolin visits Korra who fills him in on the last few years apart.

Bolin greeted her in the doorway with a host of gorgeous flowers that she filled a vase for. The weather outside slowed to a sprinkle and the light could be seen peeking out hesitantly from the clouds. His grin was wider than ever as he bounded into the room towards her. Her surprise was muddled by exhaustion even as he hoisted her into the air for one of Bolin’s signature embraces. “I mi- I mi I missed you so mu-huh-huuuuch!” Bolin stumbled over as tears and snot ran down his face. Korra was thrown about like a ragdoll in his arms with an awkward smile at the gesture. After a minute or so like that she finally tapped his shoulder in a silent plea for release. 

He gently let her down and wiped away the last remnants of his gushing affections to greet her properly. “I really missed you, Kor, where have you been?!” His excitement grew as he spoke, finally realizing Korra was here in the flesh before him.

However it was the later girls soft expressions and dark circles under her eyes that brought Bolin back to reality. She hadn't left on good terms, she hadn’t even left on her own terms. The smile she gave to him was nothing short of a reminder that Korra left in pain, and was probably still in pain after all that time. It humbled him to see her again and his expression slowly subsided.

“Ah..It’s certainty been a while, hasn’t it? I’m really sorry I didn't-” before Korra could apologize for herself Bolin cut her off. “Hold that thought! Look at this!” Out from within his rain soaked jacket he produced none other than Pabu adorned with tiny boots and and a knitted earth kingdom sweater. “It’s Earth Kingdom Pabu ™ Patent pending…” He let his smile come back full force in an effort to dissuade her guilty expression. “But listen Korra, you don’t have to explain yourself you know..” He said gently placing Pabu to the floor, watching him scurry away. “You didn’t leave to hurt any of us and _sure_ not writing was depressing and left a constant hole in my heart where my bestest bud use to be constantly beraded by the fear that she could be injured or worse and never having the ability to find out despite constant letters but Hey! You’re here now! So tell me all about your recovery. I’m sure you want to get back on the beat, fighting bad guys and who knows what!” His exclamation was proceed by a few fake blows towards her. “You ready to get back into Avatar fighting shape?”

With that Korra’s look became downcast, yet dreamy. A soft smile lifted the fatigue from within her as just the presence of her best male friend was enough. his words depressed her, yet gave her a nostalgia that warmed her inside. for a second it was enough, even just to take her mind off of what had happened over the last few years, or even just the last few _hours._

"Haha, I wouldn’t be so sure about that. But sit, we have a lot to chat about I suppose.” Korra opened up a seat for him at the table and let herself fill him in on the days she spent between the south pole and arriving home. 

She talked little of her lowest, glazing over her worst says to keep the mood while Bolin sat wide eyed and attentive. She magnified her accomplishments, gaining the strength to walk, being able to travel by sea, reaching the swamp. It wasn’t until a certain Beifong’s name was mentioned that Bolin burst from his chair in adoration of is idol. “You meat _the_ Toph?! Toph beifong?? The first to invent metal bending as an art? Who revolutionized her entire culture single handedly?! Who-” Korra pushed him back into his seat by his face with an annoyed expression. “Don’t get me started on _the_ Beifong…” Korra muttered lowly. But the stars refused to disappear from Bolins fanboyish eyes as he stared at Korra. “Is she nice?” the question came like a child questioning Santa’s existence. 

For whatever reason breaking Bolin’s perception of Toph wasn’t an option as she lied through gritted teeth. “She’s...She’s great. I learned so much. So fun. ”

“Man it must be a wonder why Lin’s so uptight then- maybe its from her dad’s side?” He pondered aloud. 

“Yea…” Korra said looking away from him. “But anyway that’s who found out there was still metal poison inside me. After we got it out it wasn’t long before the kids found me to take me home.” She finished wistfully. Bolin stood abruptly and began applauding her.

“ A true hero! A story of triumph and determination! A woman among heros- er- I mean, well nothing stopping this train down the tracks of destiny!” He shouted, laying it on a bit thick for Korra’s liking. '‘You know I know a guy, we might be able to make this into quite the mover! Call it- I don’t know, the Legend of the Avatar! Got a good ring to it doesn’t it?” 

“Haha, I don’t know about that Bo, I’m not exactly the Avatar a the moment. Right now I’m just…” She looked to her fingertips, where the last remnants of poison had once been extracted from her being. “Korra.” 

He recognized the soft look she gave herself and embraced her in yet another of Bolin’s signature hugs ™ until the realization finally hit him. “Oh- OH! You still haven’t seen Asami! Mako's doing Mako's beenn out of town with Wu but She’s been asking about you ever since you got back!" _ and probably every day before that,_ Bolin muttered to himself. Korra’s eyes went wide at the mention of the raven haired heiress.

“She’s been asking about me…?” _Maybe that means she doesn’t hate me...that’s good, I think._ Korra’s thoughts circled themselves until Bolin cleared his throat at her. “Well _yea_ ! You can’t just have your friend go missing for three years and _not_ want to see them back asap!"

He made a grab her arm once a sudden realization hit him “Oh my goodness it’s just past four! She might actually be getting out of work so we can-” 

“No!” Korra yelled accidentally startling them both. Bolin’s hand retracted to himself as he stared at her with worry. “Just...not yet. I just can’t.” 

He took hesitant step toward her. “Look- Kor. It’s been three years, if you’re worried she’s mad she really not. She just misses you.” He said practically reading her thoughts. ”Besides, you look like you haven’t relaxed in- _well-_ years. You could really use some company. Don’t you want to see your best friend?” His questing brought a pain to Korra’s chest as she couldn’t separate the girl’s image to the dreams that have haunted her over the last few days. 

“It’s not that… I don’t want to see ‘Sami, it’s just…” He peered into her as though he were reading ancient scripture through a monocle. “I’ve just...been having these...dreams… I guess. I, I think they’re trying to warn me.” 

“Dreams you say? Do go on.” He stroked an imaginary beard as he let her lead him outside to sit along a stone wall as Korra had the feeling they were suddenly not alone. The constant rain had turned the ground into mud and made water travel down the side of every roof top. For the firs moment since she’d been home, the rain was little more than a trickle over head, and light could even be seen through the clouds. Maybe it was a sign that it was time to fess up. Even if Bolin wasn't the sharpest she still felt the safest talking to him about certain things.

“ I guess...the dreams started a couple months ago. I’ve had pretty bad ones, about Zaheer and Vaatu. When I left home they were this crazy Avatar demon of me. She would follow me wherever I went and whenever I tried to sleep she was there. I haven’t seen her since I got the poison out. And I guess I haven’t really dreamed about the others in a while…” Korra’s voice sauntered off as she recollected her thoughts. Bolin listened intently, nudging her to continue. “But.. I guess after the poison came out, I started having...different dreams. Most were still pretty bad, but some weren’t as bad. A lot were nightmares about coming home. That you guys would hate me."

"But recently I’ve been sleeping nonstop and waking up in random places. It’s like I’m on auto pilot…but since I’ve been home the dreams have felt more real than ever. Being chased by crazy head ka-boom-boom lady was less intense than some of them.” She took a deep breath before continuing. “Earlier, there was a woman and it’s like she was following me outside my dreams. She...k-...she _kissed_ me. It felt so real and terrifying at the same time. Like jumping off cliff knowing someone will catch you. “ She lulled off lazily reminiscing the event. “-I woke up on the floor in the hallway, I thought it was over but all of a sudden I could...hear her, _feel_ her. Like she was right behind me but when I looked no one was there.”

“ I think...I think it was Asami.” Korra muttered into her knees as she pulled them to her chest. “I don’t know maybe my dreams are trying to tell me not to see her…”

...

“You kissed..Asami? Like In your dream?” His expression contorted in confusion until the signs smacked him like a boulder to the face. “You _LIKE_ ASAMI!” He shouted with decisiveness and shock, pointing incedulously at her. Korra’s mouth flew open in offense. 

“I-dh-eh-what?! _ME?_ Like Asami?! maybe -dh- _you_ like her!” Korra deflected the accusation back at him, refusing any self implication. Her hand flew out to point in a mirror of his accusatory gesture.

“Me? Oh no I have Opal she smells like flowers but _YOU_ -” He stared at his forehead as if he were calculating a thousand math problems at once. “You both dated Mako! Were you even jealous of Asami or where you just jealous of _Mako_ ?!” Korra’s brain wouldn’t allow her to even consider the question posed to her alongside the accusation that she would for whatever reason have a _crush_ on her best friend. The concept was laughable and yet she couldn’t formulate any retort for the obviously false narrative.

“I don’t...ugh, I don’t know but all I know is that I keep having dreams and I can’t stop thinking about her...maybe I’m just worried about her. Friends worry about each other.” her response was jumbled and half hearted. 

“Classic denial. Listen Korra look at the signs! You clearly like Asami! So why don’t you just go tell her!” He Announced boomingly.

“Because There's nothing to tell and I don’t!” Just then thunder roared over head as the clouds began to darken once more. 

Bolin stomped his foot on the ground to shield them from the incoming drizzle as he led her back inside.

As they walked through the door she found herself clutched to his side. In that moment, she found true comfort alongside him. Even if it was the briefest of moments, she let herself relax as she spoke again.

“Sigh...but there’s still one dream I can’t really understand. It was of me and Asami, but instead she became some woman named Rangi I think. I’ve never met a Rangi before so I don’t really know what it means.” 

He sighed as he felt her depress into his side as they walked through the doorway, letting the conversation die there. 

“Well, I better head out. It’s getting pretty bad outside.” Bolin grumbled looking to the gloom that had quickly developed outside. 

“You should stay, it’s dangerous to go out right now. You can have the guest bedroom. Pema will be down soon to start dinner. Have some with us.” She smiled wholesomely at him, genuinely happy to be able to feel this- any emotion other than the ones gripping at her for the longest time now. 

He smiled back at her as the rain continued to pour.

However, just beyond the door, 2 mischievous children whispered to themselves over the conversation they’d so fully eavesdropped on.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm doing my absolute best to make the words and expressions really sound like they're from these characters! Let me know how the voice sounds and anything you think I should showcase :)


	4. Dinner for two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A look into how Asami has been

The sound of crumpling up papers could be heard through Asami’s frustrated growls. “God dammit!” It was the fourth iteration of a new design for the internal guidance system for Republic Cities Train cars but her math was off ever so slightly in the end yet again. On any other day, she would never let such a little set back disrupt her so fully, but the last several days have been particularly taxing on her. 

Her assistant, ever diligent, stood calmly at the doorway of her office, unfazed by her childish outrage. “Would you be interested in your afternoon Tea, Miss Sato?” The assistant said calmly watching over the girl who hurriedly wrote and rewrote the same plans she’d been fussing over since yesterday afternoon. 

“Don’t patronize me, Lo Pain i’ll be done in a minute I just- ugh. I just need ten more minutes and then I’ll take a nap. I swear.” Asami growled with what they both knew to be a lie. She’d been unable to sleep for the past few days, kept awake by deadlines and failed prototypes. Her body refused rest at the cost of her endeavours and a frustration building within her. 

Not to mention the dreams she’d been having. Chasing after a certain blue eyed girl. The feeling of being so close to her... even if it was just a dream her mind became overwhelmed at the images her unconscious mind presented her. 

_ Korra would never even see me that way. Even if there was a chance, I’d have felt it by now.  _ Asami thought with remorse.

Even still the elderly assistant sighed as she adjusted her glasses. “ I regret to inform you that ‘just ten minutes’ passed well over 6 hours ago. With the clarity in overstepping I will personally remark, you need to sleep, Miss Sato, a corporation cannot run off of varricakes and jasmine tea alone as I'm sure you're fully aware.” 

Asami only grumbled in response, tossing hair back from in front of her eyes. She didn’t want to sleep. She wanted to finish these blueprints. She wanted to submit them and start on the next project. Finish that one and clear her schedule for the rest of the _ year.  _ She just wanted...she just wanted to keep working. Anything to stay awake. She fiddled with a pen that refused to stay upright in her tense hand as she frantically drew out a machine she was becoming all too familiar with. Within her mind she could see every wire, twist every bolt and see it come to life with the flip of a switch. She focused on it so greatly that the small mistakes she’d let herself make were enough to topple her world on its head. Her brow furrowed under the yellow light of her work desk. 

“I just have to adjust for the diameter of the lug nuts from albatross we ordered which should reduce-” Her mutterings to herself were cut off as an elderly hand covered her own. Stopping in her tracks Asami looked up to the gentle eyes of her assistant. Without even having to exchange words Asami could hear the conversation already.

_ You need rest. _

_ I don’t- I’m fine.  _

_ Your body says otherwise _

_ I’ll be fine. Lo Pain I’ve done this before. _

_ Yes when your father first went to jail.  _

_ This is different. _

_ Is it? _

Asami’s eyes softened at the mental exchange. She took a moment to glance over her office in complete disarray from her last few days of dangerous focus. Another sigh burrowed out from her chest. “ I suppose I have been over doing it the last few days, haven't I?” She ended with a sardonic chuckle.

“ I heard Avatar returned just as long ago. That wouldn’t happen to be related to this…” Lo Pain cringed looking over the disheveled office space she was tasked with organizing. “...creativity session, would it?”

Asami’s face grew red at the mention of the Avatar. Her lips formed a thin line as she sucked in a breath. “I...I suppose the timing isn’t quite off.” An incoming headache pounded against her skull like a parade marching through her brain.

“Why don’t you give her a visit? You talk about her often enough.” Lo Pain thought aloud as she began collecting loose papers thrown about the floor. 

Asami’s hands turned into hollow fists as she straightened her back. “Visit Korra? Ha...ya know it’d been so long that thought never even occurred to me.” She gazed out into the dark grey clouds that had surrounded them for days now. “Maybe...maybe when it stops raining I can go check how she’s doing.” Asami lied, knowing full well she could never muster up the courage to confront the girl who hadn’t written to her in months. What would she say? If Korra truly wanted to see Asami, wouldn’t she make the effort to come here first? 

Lo Pain only hummed in response as she swept around her employer.

“It sure has been raining a lot lately.” Asami wondered wistfully.

“I’ll say, all this weather's giving these old bones a run for my money.” The older woman grumbled to herself. But before Asami left the office she found herself gazing out the window. “But ya know, they say when it rains the spirits are crying over the misfortune of humans. Who knows, maybe it’s a sign.” 

Asami only snorted in response as she collected her things and dismissed herself for the day. Walking down several flights of stairs she arrived at the parking garage and smiled nostalgically at her car before getting in. No matter her mood, the weather, or anything life could throw at her, she always found some sense of peace on an open road.

Luckily with the weather as it had been, the roads were empty enough, and as experienced a driver as she was, the speed limit was just a suggestion. However, today seemed different. Today marked day 4 of an inhuman lack of sleep. Today maekred day four of officially knowing that Korra had come home, that she was finally safe and back and alive...yet still hasn’t come to see her. It was day four of feeling like she truly didn’t have a place in the Avatars life anymore after years of keeping her own flame alive in the storm.

The water battered against her doors as she sped through the drowned streets. Her hands gripped the steering wheel like the edge of a cliff as she threw caution to the wind. Her exhausted and angry mind knew not safety not restraint as she made her way to her mansion. 

When she finally arrived the doors were thrust open before her servant could even grab the handle. She stormed through the expanse of her marble floored halls with a resounding click click click of her heels to announce to her house she was home.

_ Why should I even care? If she really wanted to be here she would be.  _ Asami flung off her shirt and heels as she found herself in her gold accented bathroom. She dumped a fair amount of her favorite jasmine scented oil into a tub big enough for 3 and turned the water on as high as she knew she could tolerate. 

She found herself staring into the mirror. Her body to anyone else would be an immaculate masterpiece. Every curve any man would die to indulge in. But in her mind numbing state, she said little that didn’t sadden her. A deep fear of inadequacy lingered since the day Korra left and Asami wasn’t asked to join her. Even then she had hope. Dipping herself slowly into the beautiful smelling bathwater Asami let a hot breath escape her lungs attempting to untense her rigid body, tricking it into relaxing despite her grief. 

_ I hate that after all this time...I still miss her. But if she’d wanted to talk to me, she would have. If she wanted to see me...she’d be here by now.  _ Asami internally struggled while another voice inside her head gave the benefit of the doubt, always.  _ But she went through so much. She nearly died, and to this day the world expects so much of her. But god she could've been dead for all I knew...for all any of us knew. _

“You’d think I’d be over this silly crush after 3 years…” Asami sighed to herself. 

She’d gone on dates, meetups, one night stands...anything to fill the void but it never worked. The last year of the three in particular are when it all started. When the letters stopped all together. It was when she’d become so enthralled in her work that she forfeited sleep as often as she could in favor or restless nights with no end. She’d even briefly considered giving Mako a third chance but never did. She had to admit, seeing the boys was hard enough, not only as they drifted apart since Korra’s departure, but their presence only reminded her of Korra’s absence. By the end of every conversation no matter how far it lingered from her, Asami ended the night thinking about the blue eyes waterbender. Wondering if she was recovering, if she’d ever see her again, or if she was even still alive. 

Not a single letter in the last 427 days. Asami mentally cursed herself for keeping track. 

But the thing that was nagging at her heart in that moment alone in the tub was the fact that she was  _ there.  _ That after years of not seeing one another Korra was finally there. So close she could see her in 30 minutes flat...but didn’t. Asami sighed into the water as bubbles formed around her, the heat of the water turning her face red on contact. The tingling hurt but it was a distraction. 

* * *

**3 years and 2 weeks earlier**

The bags under Korra’s eyes were only a fraction of the visible hopelessness in the crippled Avatar’s eyes. Her expression was so downtrodden that it haunted Asami whenever she slept. The weeks following Zaheer's attack were the longest of Their lives. Filled with anguish and trauma that settled itself within not only Korra’s bones, but Asami’s heart as well. Seeing a woman she’d slowly developed  _ something  _ to physically waste away in her own suffering was a pain Asami could have never imagined she’d ever go through. She cried nightly for Korra, battered by her own empathy. 

It was through these trials and tribulations that Asami stepped forth farther than anyone else, encapsulating the Avatar’s time, playing pai sho (and letting Korra win) feeding her, holding her hand as healers did what they could with an ailment they didn’t understand. 

Without Asami even realizing it, her friendship became devotion before Korra’s eyes, even if neither were aware of it. Days off became a leave of absence, and motivational words became heartfelt interactions. Of course Bolin and Mako chimed in with fun stories and brief intermissions of friendly banter, but nothing anyone did surmounted to the personal responsibility Asami overtook with the then handicapped woman. 

During the nights Korra couldn’t sleep Asami would tell her tales of other childhood and stories her father told her. She would light up at the thoughts of her mother and their time together. She’d say how proud she was of Korra with every breath she dared to take. 

Every word she gave to Korra was coated in honey and lavender, meant to sooth and to heal, but they both knew Korra was truly not improving. 

Then came time for Korra’s leave with her parents. 6 weeks they said. But even then 6 weeks felt more than Asami could bear after what she’d put herself through to protect Korra as she was.

_ Please let me come with you. Just ask and I’ll drop everything. Hell I’ll manage my company from the south pole just please...don’t leave.  _ Asami thought in desperacy.

A tinge in her heart made its home there as she saw the boat cast off to the endless ocean that would keep them apart. 

That day, Asami made a small promise to herself. One she never shared with a soul.

_ The second I see her again. I’m going to tell her how I feel.  _

* * *

To this day that promise weighed heavy on her heart. It was a promise she mulled over in her mind ever since she truly understood her own feelings.

When Korra finally arrived home a few days ago, Asami had all but given up home no matter how often she’d tried to force herself. It was Bolin who first barged into her downtown office to declare the good news. 

Asami sunk further into the water, her headache finally soothing itself despite her torrent of feelings. Her sleepless thoughts turned from the frustration in not seeing the aforementioned water tribe girl to the reasons she missed her in the first place.

She wanted so hard to be angry, she wanted to just forget about the woman as she clearly had been. She hated how worried she’d become over the last few years. She hated how abruptly the letters had stopped and how she still wrote regardless. She hated all the letters she refrained from spilling her feelings, and all the things she withheld from telling the recovering Avatar. 

...

She hated that she still loved her. 

...

And how easily she knew she’d forgive her. She hated how even now she’d drop everything just to see that beautiful woman again.

She hated that crooked smile, and how giddy it made her feel. Or her laugh that made her heart swell. 

Asami’s tired mind drifted even further as a warm began to swell in her body down her legs. She hummed as her thoughts continued down an all to familiar line of thinking. 

She bit her lip and closed her eyes with an almost pained expression.

“ _ Korra _ …” Asami whispered under her breath.

Miles away Korra felt herself sitp up abruptly as a chill was forced up her spine. “Did you say something Bolin?” She asked until she saw his face jam packed with pork buns. “Hmm?” He mumbled as sauce ran down his chin. “Ah, nevermind.” As she turned her focus down to her plate her focus began to waver as the sensation had yet to leave her and a new feeling of dizziness invaded her. Her eyelids suddenly fluttered, fighting to stay open as her concentration began to waver. 

Asamis hands ran up and down her own arms, envisioning Korra’s strong hands were the one’s gripping her, Holding her firmly. She imagined those same hands kneading into her softly, testing her, teasing her,  _ wanting _ her. 

Underneath the dinner table, Korra crossed her legs tightly. her breath became labored and her vision blurred. The room seemed to sway and yet no one was any the wiser. Bumi's loud excerpts overtook the concentration of the room. 

The sounds of her bathtub's waterfall was the only thing concealing her soft moans. 

_ God I’m horrible. What would Korra think if she saw me now?  _ Asami’s thoughts turned from guilt to lustful degradation. _ God she’d think I was pathetic wouldn’t she? A hopeless slut, a puppy waiting by the door way. She would kiss me against the doorway... _

Her fingers ventured deeper within herself.

Korra’s body fought not to curl further into itself as her intrusive thoughts grew more intense. The room beyond her had faded away and it was as though the ghost of a person writhed before her. Her body fought not to move with her dreams, flexing, curling grinding. It wanted so badly to play along with the scene her body convinced her what was happening.Her breath turned to low panting as Boomi suddenly burst onto the table, enrapturing the kids and table guests. Not a single pair of eyes laid on Korra. Her hands gripped as thought they could meld into tender sides. Her mind craved to venture deeper into the kiss of a woman she couldn’t focus on, in a dream that wasn't real.

Asami moaned liberally, her mind was entranced with vividly intimate situations, all of which in her mind appeared as a blur. The touch of velvet skin, two mouths dancing against each other, hands that roamed without consequence. “... _ K-Kyoshi _ ...” 

For the briefest of moments, Korra's eyes flickered a glowing white light. With it, only Kya's eyes turned and saw Korra sitting, her body tense and rigid. Her eyes were half lifted at ehr plate as sweat beaded at her forehead. Her hands twitched with tension at the table's edge cloth. a shaky tongue flickered out ti wet dry lips.

“ _ Rangi _ …” Korra whispered so slightly, that almost no one in the room heard her. However Kya had. Despite it being whispered underbreath she’d heard it clear as day as she glanced over to Korra despite Bumi having jumped on the table declaring his military feats to the camtivated kids and bewildered adults. Even bolin was wide eyed in the events etrancing the entire room from even noticing the Avatar’s current expressions. 

Kya's brow furrowed in brief worry, but she decided not to draw attention towards herself or Korra. It was only with a graceful side eye that she watched Korra’s body fight to not contort itself, sitting as still as it could in that moment. If the deep blush that labored Korra’s face and the spiritual glow that fought to come from behind her eyes was any indication of where she was, she wasn’t in pain, but she wasn’t present either. 

Asami Withdrew her fingers quickly and splashed her hand angrily at the water as her body refused to find solace in her actions. Her chest was groaning with unresolved tension asn she thrust herself from the water. Her legs quivered and nearly failed her, but her hand reached out to grab the sides of her waterfall tub. 

Just then, Korra was thrust out of her intimate daydream and immediately felt lost, confused, and above all else, full of an unresolved need. Reality was such a foreign concept as her vision unblurred and the guests at the table came further into focus. 

_ No...No I can’t think of her this way… Asami groaned into her hand, so frustrated tears began to free flow down her eyes as she stood in the waist deep jasmine water.  _

Korra's head shook from side to side, trying to shake herself back into reality.  _ I saw her..I..I saw her she..she was there!  _ Korras brain racked, distraught with the near projections created from her mind. It was until that moment that she remained unnoticed. As Bumi’s grandiose story found it’s end the adults of the table glanced about themselves. Kya's eyes glazed over Korrra knowlingly with a slight smile and turned to join the conversation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is actually only about 90% complete. I have had a bit of writers block on it, but I decided it's better to push through with what I know I want to happen and then add edits as I move forward!   
> So the last half of the chapter is the basic structure, but more details will be added about the people at the table and potentially Kya's inner thoughts as she is more important as the story movies on.
> 
> Please let me know what you think!
> 
> and yes I will of course add more to the masturbation scene, what do you think I am, a hack?

**Author's Note:**

> Please let me know what you think so far :) I'd love any notes on where to take this or what you'd like to see transpire between the two <3 I m planning for Asami's reaction to be a little different than what I normally see ;)
> 
> Should Asami find Korra's letters? What do they mean?


End file.
